Hello! Our names are Sean Hoffman and Alanna
Dickerson, and we're offering advice to anyone that seeks it on any matter
whatsoever. We'll give our honest opinions on any issue, whether it be
your relationships, job, home life, or anything else.
Date:
3/28/07
Subject:
why me
Comment:
IVE LIKED ALOT
OF BOYS FOR THE PAST DAYS AND NONE OF THEM SEEM TO LIKE ME AM I SUPPOSE
TO GIVE UP OR JUST,PLUS THEY ACT LIKE YHEY LIKE ME AND THEN WHEN I ASK
THEM IF THEY ACTUALLY DO, THEY SAY NO AND CALL ME NAMES BEHIND MY BACK.I
DONT KNOWE WHAT TO DO .
Our Response:
One thing is for certain- you deserve a guy that appreciates and
respects you, and these guys that you are choosing don't sound like they
fit that description at all. If they lead you on and don't have nice
things to say about you, they're not worth your time. Don't stress out
about finding a boyfriend, because when the time is right, one will come
around that deserves you and treats you like a princess. Don't rush to
find one. Family, friends, focusing on school, and hobbies should be
your priorities right now.
Date:
3/27/07
Subject:
Fighting
Friends
Comment:
I talked to
you guys before about how my senior friend and I got into a big figh.
Well we've started talking but it's not the same. It feels really akward
talking to her about important things when I feel that she still may be
mad at me. I've asked her about this and she always just brushes my
questions aside and I know she has a hard time trusting people, but I
really want to get back on that level of trust we had before our fight.
It's like I've lost my best friend and sister.
Our Response:
Keep following our previous advice and be honest with her about your
feelings that things aren't the same. Honestly, if she chooses to stay
mad at you and allows your friendship to be changed by the fight,
there's not much you can do. If she doesn't want to open up and work
things out, you can't make her.
Date:
3/27/07
Subject:
misc.
Comment:
i am having
these very strong feelings for this girl and i believe she feels teh
same to a certain extent but lately her boyfriend has been causing her
more and more distress you could say and she has been in tears alot and
so im always cheering her up and stuff like that and then last night her
boyfriend freaked out about me telling her how i felt and so he pretty
much told her he coudl never talk or see me again and and her nor me
really like that at all and so im jsut stuck on what to do and trying to
stop it from becoming violent
Our Response:
Tell your friend that it sounds like she needs to lose this guy, because
no guy is worth all of the fighting and tears. A guy that's worthy of
her will treat her right so she'll never have a reason to cry and be
unhappy. The fact that he tries to control who she can and cannot see
and talk to is also ridiculous and not at all good for her. She needs to
move on and find someone that treats her with respect and dignity, and
that values people close to her, like you, the same way she does.
Date:
3/27/07
Subject:
Comment:
I APPLIED FOR
A PATICULAR SCHOOL AND I PUT MY OLD SCHOOL ON THE FORM, AND ITS
BASICALLY NOT A NICE SCHOOL. I DIDNT GET ACCEPTED TO THAT SCHOOL I
APPLIED FOR AT THE START. DO YOU THINK THAT I DIDNT GET IN BECAUSE OF
THE SCHOOL I FIRST WENT TO.AND IF IT IS WHAT SHOULD DO ABOUT.
Our Response:
There's no way for us to know whether or not you didn't get accepted
because of your former school. That may have something to do with it,
but if you took advanced classes and did well in them, we don't see why
your school would matter much. Many schools allow you to appeal their
decision and have another chance to prove to them that you're worthy of
attending their school, so you could try that.
Date:
3/15/07
Subject:
Friend or Not?
Comment:
I have this
friend who has a tiny tendency to talk just a bit too
much. Like if I talk to her on the phone, the call exceeds one hour
because
she's mostly talking and talking (without stopping to pause), and by the
time
she reaches the end of what she has to say, I lose my will to listen.
Most of
the time when I'm talking to her, it's like I want to talk to her about
her
habit. But I'm afraid to hurt her feelings because she is a really good
friend
and a nice person. Do you have any suggestion as to what I should do?
signed,
Ears Talked Off
Our Response:
Tell your friend nicely that you value what she has to say, and
appreciate that she's comfortable enough with you to be able to tell you
anything, but sometimes it feels like you don't get to share as much
with her. Tell her you want the same opportunity to talk about your life
as she has to talk about hers. Remember to be kind and tactful, because
how you word something greatly affects what impression the person gets
from what you're saying.
Date:
3/14/07
Subject:
Frustration
Comment:
Dear Advice
Columnists, As I find myself deeply entrenched in my love and adoration
for my same-sex life partner, I also find that she has increasingly
begun to express her love in more biting, sarcastic and sometimes
tyrrantical methods. She constantly nags at me for emitting small sighs
or groans, and she's fully prepared to launch into a complete rage
whenever I *dare* to breathe a word of response amidst one of her
numerous rants. What should I do? I can't imagine going on without
her--but I don't think I can stand another self-righteous speech about
how "rude" I act when she's speaking, or how I should keep my groans to
myself. She is slowly causing my self-confidence to deteriorate--a
privilage I have allowed no man or woman to succeed in in the past.
Sincerely, Interrupting Groaner
Our Response:
Remember that for any relationship to work, both partners need to be
able to communicate with each other comfortably. It may seem like she is
nagging, but maybe they are feelings she really needs to let out. Let
her know that she tends to be sarcastic and insensitive, because your
self confidence and feelings are just as important. If you both can't
work it out and have rational conversations, then maybe staying together
isn't the best idea. A relationship won't be successful without strong,
open communication lines.
Date:
3/14/07
Subject:
Too Confused
Comment:
I've been with
this guy for almost a year now, but things arent going so great lately.
He's been drinking more, getting into pot again, and calling one of his
exes just about every day. He knows how he's been acting lately bothers
me, but isnt trying to change anything. Meanwhile, I've accidentally
started to fall for another guy... pretty hard too. I've known this guy
longer than I've known my bf, and he's always been good to me. Whenever
I was sad about anything, it would be him trying to cheer me up. I'm
scared of losing my bf since I've been with him so long, but I'm
starting to think that I would be better off with the other guy. =/ I
dont know what to do.
Our Response:
Have a serious talk with your boyfriend about his bothersome habits one
last time, and tell him that if he doesn't change, you can't be with him
anymore. You deserve someone that respects you as well as himself, and
the way he's acting right now doesn't seem like he's accomplishing
either. Sometimes you have to forget how you feel and remember what you
deserve, no matter how long you've been with the person or how hard it
is to let go. As for the other guy, keep your options open. If you leave
your boyfriend, make sure you don't start dating the other guy as a
rebound, or just to have a boyfriend around.
Date:
3/13/07
Subject:
heart vs brain
Comment:
dear,????? my
boyfriend and i have been going out for awhile and he say's he loves me
but i not so sure because most the guys i've been with all say that they
love me but i think that they say that just to get something from me.
see i was in a deep realtionship that ended up lasting 1 1/2 year and
ended really badly. my current boyfriend say's that your first true love
is the hardest. i like my boyfriend alot i just afraid that if i love
him that i can get hurt again, i know i shuold put myself out there but
i never knew it would be so hard?? so it would really help if i got some
advice on the subject!! from, what i used to be
Our Response:
All you can do is see if things change now that he's told you he loves
you. If he starts asking you and pressuring you to do things for him
that you're not comfortable with because you both are "in love" now,
then he's only out to use and hurt you. If he continues to prove that
he's worthy of you and still respects you, don't be afraid of being with
him. Remember that in any relationship, you have to be able to put
yourself out there, and maybe get hurt in the end- it's a risk you have
to take. And even if you are a little hurt at the end when you break up,
it may still be worth all of the good times you shared.
Date:
3/13/07
Subject:
THANK- YOU
Comment:
THANK YOU FOR
ALL YOUR HELP. YALL ARE REALLY NICE. YHANK YOU AGAIN, YOU HELPED ME OUT
ALOT
Our Response:
No problem. We're glad to help. :)
Date:
3/9/07
Subject:
Bomb Scare
Comment:
Hello on March
7th i reported info. on what the suspects of the code yellow bomb scare
people looked like, when I heard talk in the bath room. Then today I
heard that one of the people that matched the description I gave was
arrested. Do you think I should get a little reward money like the
school had promise. My teacher and I are both fighting with the office
trying to convince them to give me something for putting my head on the
line and turning these guys in.
Our Response:
The following response was obtained from the principal, Dr. Sisler:
"Reward was given to a student who gave us the names of the students who
perpetrated one of the bomb hoaxes. Information from this student was
the only information received that led to the arrest of these students.
The information submitted by the web correspondent did not help us
identify the students involved."
Date:
3/9/07
Subject:
B.O.Y.S
Comment:
THIS BOY I
LIKE CALLED ME SOME CHOICE NAMES , IDONT WANT TO SAY IT HERE, AND THEN
THE NEXT DAY HE TOLD ME THAT HE WANTED TO GO OUT WITH ME. SHOULD I SAY
YES OR NO. I REALLY LIKE HIM ALOT. I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO. MY FREINDS
SAY ONE THING AND MY MIND SAYS ANOTHER, AND HES PRESSURING ME ALOT.IM
LOST
Our Response:
If you have to wonder about whether or not he's even worthy of being
with you, he's probably not. He may have been joking around about what
he called you, but if it hurt you, it's no laughing matter. Stick to
guys that are respectful.
Date:
3/7/07
Subject:
old friends
Comment:
i used to go
to this private school from kindergarten-7th grade until i left and went
to mandarin middle for a year then now im here. to keep our friendship
close i decided to use a notebook to write down all of our personal
notes and i would take it to my church((school and church are at the
same place))and give it to one of my friends. then the next week i would
get it and write stuff and take it back etc. well i found out that at
the begginng of this school year they let the guy that ive liked for
about 9ish years read it. i was soo mad. ive deleted their numbers out
of my contact list and havent spoken to them since. should i still talk
to them or will it seem well...i dunno...weird?!?
Our Response:
It was wrong for your friends to do that behind your back, and you
should tell them that you're not okay with it. They aren't very good
friends if they're going against what you want. You don't have to stop
talking to them altogether, but you should keep a closer eye on them and
not trust them with anything you don't want anyone else to know.
Date:
3/6/07
Subject:
Fighting
Friends
Comment:
I've got a
friend that I've know for a couple of years now. She's been like an
older sister to me since I meet her. We got into this huge fight right
before Christmas and ever since I've been trying to patch up our
friendship. The only thing is is that she's a senior and is really busy
and doesn't have any time to really talk. I really value our friendship
and I'm afraid that we won't be able to get over this until later in the
year and by then she may be off at college. Can you guys help??
-Friendless Freshman
Our Response:
A
true close friend won't let one fight ruin the whole friendship. Let her
know how you feel, that you do value your friendship and miss having her
around. Ask her when her schedule will allow her some free time, and
plan a day for both of you to hang out doing things you both love and
used to do together. You can't change the fact that she has a lot to do,
so the key is to just be honest with her and make plans whenever it is
convenient for her.
Date:
3/6/07
Subject:
freinds
Comment:
i hyave a
freind who talks about me and she told this boy ilike that ilike him..
she really hurt me should i be her freind or just tell her were not
freinds any more.
Our Response:
If she told a boy that you actually do like that you like him, it's
understandable that you feel hurt or maybe embarrassed if you wanted it
to stay a secret. But her intentions were probably not to hurt you, but
to help you out in seeing if the boy also likes you. If her intentions
were good, it's definitely not worth losing a friendship over. But if
she talks about you behind your back, you should confront her about it
and let her know that it hurts you. If she doesn't shape up, she's not
as good a friend as you thought, and isn't worth keeping around.
Date:
3/6/07
Subject:
freind
Comment:
i know this
girl whos bi or lez and i think she likes me what should i do.
Our Response:
You could be straightforward and ask her, or you could wait to see if
she does end up telling you that she does, in fact, like you. Whatever
you decide, if she does like you, be honest and tell her how you feel.
Even if you don't feel the same way, it's better than lying and leading
her on. Be kind about it.
Date:
3/6/07
Subject:
C.R.U.S.H.
Comment:
okay, there is
this boy that i like. i mean he makes me smile inside and out JUST by
standing there. His walk, his talk, his style.. and i'm sooo shy..i'm
used to my friends going up to the guy and telling him that i like
him..but now my friendz r tellin me to tell him MYSELF.. but when i go
to talk to him i freeze up n all i can say is "wessup"..he makes me
feel, the way i used to feel before my sister died..like i felt
complete..when i see him i feel complete like everything is gonna b
alright..and i never felt this way about somebody(besides my sis)... I
got a crush..i feel like i'm back in middle school..lol ...but i want
him to kno.. i cant be shy all my life..but he look soo good.. i'm just
a regular gurl..i dont stand out like them other females..i dont have
the money like everybody else so i cant go shopping and go all out wit
my clothez...but i want him soo bad..i mean i want him sssoooooooo
bad..."he puts tha beat in my heart, everytime i c him, thoughts r
gettin deeper".. i dont know what to do.. what do you suggest?? ~SHY~
Our Response:
It's understandable that you really really care about someone like this;
it happens to all of us at some point. Keeping it to yourself isn't
going to get you anywhere, so let him know that you like him.
Realistically though, there's always the chance that he won't like you
back in the same way. It's important that you remember not to base your
happiness solely on whether you're with a certain guy. Never forget the
love you get from your friends and family, because they'll be there for
you when a guy may eventually walk out of your life. Don't be crushed if
you don't get the response you expect from him; take comfort in the fact
that you have these friends & family members, and love and be happy with
yourself enough to know that you don't need a guy to make you complete
or happy.
Date:
3/5/07
Subject:
Boyz
Comment:
I just moved
here..started the new year at MHS..I met this guy in one of my classes
and kinna clicked...but my friend like him n they clicked first..but he
did not like her like she thought..but then I started developing
feelings for him..but he is kind of a flirt...and I cannot tell if he
feels the same way...he flirts but I dont know if its just that or
something deeper...Should I ask him or just let it be..I dont want to
make our friendship weird or anything but I want to know if he likes me
Our Response:
If you really want to know, just straight up ask him. It's not a big
deal, and it most likely won't affect your friendship or make it weird.
A guy appreciates a straightforward girl that will come out and be
honest. And if he doesn't like you, remember you still have a fun friend
in him and there are plenty of other guys you'll come across that will
like you back in the same way.
Date:
3/1/07
Subject:
Smoking and
Drugs in School
Comment:
I would like
to know how it is so easy for students to smoke at school and during
school. I would also like to know how drugs are brought to school and
done at and during school as well. I have brought this to the attention
of a few, but see or feel that nothing is being done. Concerned Parent.
Our Response:
The reality is that the security and faculty at the school cannot watch
over 3000+ students all at one time. They do their best, but incidents
are bound to happen at some point that they miss. Talk to the principal
and administration about your concerns, and we're sure they'll take you
very seriously and create more measures to ensure the safety of all the
students.
